Too Many Damned Questions

hayabusa

“Don’t you just hate it when you have to spend 10 minutes explaining a 10-second phone call?” fumed Jamal as he slammed down his riding gloves on the table. We all looked at him knowingly as we pushed aside our teh tariks out of a shared sense of commiseration. Despite his strapping six-foot-two frame and Rambo-style demeanour, Jamal was no playboy and was as likely to cheat on his wife as Melaka would receive six inches of snow tomorrow night. Everyone knew this; everyone, of course, except his wife.

Maybe it’s his 200-mile-per-hour Suzuki Hayabusa that’s parked under a nearby tree. Maybe it’s his softer-than-marshmallows heart. Maybe it’s his disarmingly intense smile. Maybe these are the things that are driving his wife to believe (erroneously) in horror scenarios of him copulating with every female in sight if given half a chance.

But maybe it’s not anything to do with him at all.

The rest of us are nothing like Jamal. We all drive beat-up old Protons that do 0-60 kph in about a week, look like Rodney Dangerfield after a horrific traffic accident and are about as suave as baboons at a ballroom dancing competition. Yet every single one of us switch our mobiles to silent-mode (or turn them off altogether) when we go home after work.

And why is this so?

No, it’s not because stray vixens in heat, smitten by our stunning good looks and overwhelmed by our sexual prowess are likely to call us during dinner. Get real, OK? Even if we had sexually-compliant, nubile nymphomaniacs stashed away at a luxury condo somewhere, we’d be smart enough to tell them not to call us at home, right?

No, the real reason we live such sad lives (risk missing calls no matter how important) is because we don’t want to go through what Jamal has had to go through: spend 10 minutes explaining a 10-second phone call. Yes, folks! It doesn’t get sadder than this. But for the sake of domestic peace – and keeping our sanity (what’s left of it) intact – this is what we have to do. Explaining to our bosses (or clients) why we didn’t answer his call is always much easier than explaining the conversation (had we answered the call) to she-who-must-be-obeyed. At least, our bosses (or clients) will have, at the most, maybe five questions!

A fellow blogger, a smooth operator known as Uncle Lee, maintains that women are to be loved, not understood. I subscribe to this whole-heartedly, too. But I’ll let you in on a secret: men need to be UNDERSTOOD. No, we are not so unreasonable as to demand to be understood in our totality. This is too much. All we need women to understand is that we cannot stomach having to face an inquisition for even the most minor of things.

As a friend of mine puts it, we have a tough enough time hunting mouse-deer and fighting sabre-toothed tigers. We have little patience with “Why are you home late today?” and its 25 or so supplementary questions. Maybe we should just bypass the questions and instead go straight to, “No, dear! I am not 30 minutes later than usual because I met this slut on the way home and decided to bonk her silly first. And how was your day, dear?”

My comrade-in-arms, Tommy Yewfigure, is partly right when he says that women ask too many damned questions. The damned questions are only part of it. Worse are the implications behind the questions. Somehow, they are not merely requests for further information, are they? The questions invariably assume that somehow, somewhere and at some time we’ve been up to no bloody good. And if we are sloppy in answering these questions, we’ll be rewarded with yet another barrage of questions (replete with their not-so-nice implications).

In case there’s any doubt, let me explain. We don’t really mind the questions (as long as you limit them to two or three); what really drive us up the walls are the loaded ones. Of course, saying this will not just stop them from asking loaded questions. Instead it will lead them to clam-up altogether and not to talk to us at all.

So, what are we to do? Of course, I suggested to my friends that we just grin, bear it and think of England. It was either that or become gay. To this Jamal quipped, “OK, if we do, the one who draws the shortest straw gets Bangkai!”

Note: This post was partly inspired by my friend Tommy Yew and also partly by fellow-MRSMer Oldstock (whose story appears here)

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35 thoughts on “Too Many Damned Questions

  1. Bro,

    Be prepared for a barrage of comments from the fairer sex on this… but hey, I say, bring it on!

    But err… but the image of Jamal on Bangkai scary lah bro. Hahahaha….

    Oldstock

    That image scares me more than it does you, bro! Scarier even than having to take 10 minutes to explain a 10-second call.

  2. I think you men have a suicidal tendency – why can’t you give a straightforward and honest answer to a woman’s (be it your wife, mother, girlfriend…whatever) query/queries, a phone call on top of that. Its your um..and ah.. not looking straight into the eyes, vague and dismissive that resulted in that 10 minutes explanation. Just answer who, what, why, and if applicable where and when. Good Luck!

    NanaDJ

    Ah! But the point is, in polite society, we need not even answer the who question let alone the why, how, where or when question. But we get suckered into it all the time. It all starts by answering the seemingly innocent, “Who was that, dear?”

    After that it all goes downhill – no matter how straight our answers are.

  3. 🙂 Dear MB and gang..

    (dare i quote this?)

    “There are no bad soldiers, only bad generals” – Napoleon

    (hehehe…. caaaaaaabut!!) 😉

    p.s. i kinda agree with oldstock, i dont think brokeback mountain would suit u lol.

    justiffa

    This takes me back to the good old days when I used to be a general. Then I got married. Now, like almost all other married men, I am a lowly foot-soldier! If I am a bad foot-soldier, you can blame it on my general 🙂

  4. MB

    Yessiree, bob. You’ve described the many travails of many good men.

    de minimis

    Someone had to do it, bro.

    Maybe this is what it feels like to be a suicide bomber 🙂

  5. Mat-san,

    Is it still all quiet on the domestic front, or, if my hunch is right, the trend that is beginning to develop in your recent postings indicate something amiss, or about to be?

    Stay cool, my friend..in the worst case, didn`t the Bard write..”the world is a stage, where all men are actors.”And,” to be or not to be, that is the question”(I love this!)

    At the end of the day, my friend, life boils down to a question of choices.It`s all in our hands(Sigh..if only it was so easy!)

    Cheers!

    Higashi-san

    Amiss? Naaaaaaah! Not in the least. Really! I’m absolutely positive about this.

    Yep! Its our choices that make us who we are; chioces also help us re-model.

  6. Hey Matt, how is it I got this sinking feeling that I’m being portrayed as the ‘batu api Ronson’ here? Ya blame it on Tommy as usual. 🙂

    I also note that ‘Oldstock’ had regained his youthful exuberance with that ‘bring it on’ outburst. If it’s not curbed, pretty soon he’ll become ‘ExpiredGoods’ as his new nic. 🙂

    Since we’re into famous quotes here; I guess the old RAF pilot in MB would have heard of this b4;

    “Never in the field of human conflict, was so much owed by so many to so few.”

    Thanks MB for taking a stand & writing this post on behalf of all the sorry sods……muahaha.

    Higashi-san, let me complete Bard for u….‘the world is a stage, where all men are actors’. But he failed to mention that, ‘All Women are DRAMA Queens’.

    Hey guys, I can see dark clouds ahead; guys get ready for the major storm & the UFOs, rolling pins & all!

    Peace,
    Tommy

    Tommy

    But sir! Its a question pf perspective. From my vantage point, you are the inspiration – not the Batu Ronson

    And yes, I am feeling very much like a Spitfire pilot after uploading this post – the few going up against overwhelming odds to stand up for the many who are being pulverised by women the Luftwaffe.

    I’ll be Oldstock’s wingman any time!

  7. Hey,

    You MEN! You give us more than our fair share of headaches too!

    Let’s face it…another man with Jamal’s adjectives might not pass up a chance to `copulate with every female in sight if given half a chance.’

    Men need to retreat into their caves as much as women need to talk to find solutions for issues.

    Nobody’s right and nobody’s wrong…we are just different.

    Take a cue from Uncle Lee, just love your woman and if the muscles in your face still works, just smile and let it pass.

    And to the women who are reading this…give your man a break… 3 questions at a time…their brain can only take so much before it freezes!

    Too many damned questions unanswered!

    In the pink corner

    Let me get this right. When a woman is being insufferable, men are supposed to smile and let its pass. But when a man does the same thing, he’s a MCP! Yep, that sounds fair.

    And I guess you are right. Please, whatever you do, limit the questions to no more than three at any one go. We don’t want men’s brains to freeze-up from the exertion – they might turn into women.

    • See?

      You’re doing it again! Retreat and defend your stand from your cave.

      I reiterate…we are just different.

      Women do smile and let a lot of things pass too!

      You want your cake and eat it too. ..at the end of the day, you’ll realise that it is impossible.

      In the pink corner

      On the contrary, I do see.

      But aren’t you a tad too adversarial for a someone who has come to embrace the difference between men and women?

  8. you uncles are scaring me more and more every day i hope it’s all just ironic cynicism (whatever this means) cause i don’t think i am a bender so i guess i have no choice but to be romantically-inclined towards the female species.

    and dear nana no women would ever want straightforward and honest answers that would mean us being let off easy despite the lack of reasoning for us to not be let off easily.

    penyelamat dunia

    The world is a scary place, son 🙂

  9. You know, dear, I don’t ask question (trust me its damn hard to do that) so I won’t be lied to.

    So, I speak and ask questions to Steinbeck, that Russian Dostoevs – cant bloody spell his name. Sometimes I speak to Hamka, Marah Roesli, I know, I know… they are all dead. Sad huh?

    Its easier to speak to men in death than they are alive.

    Fellow ladies, please back me up.

    p/s: That Higashi-san chap is so clever I tell you, do be careful when you answer his questions/hunch.

    Elviza

    You don’t ask questions? Wow! Just let me say this, when men look at you, they’ll see hope; when they look at your husband, they’ll feel envy.

    No, ma’am, you don’t need fellow ladies to back you up. A man would be out of his mind to harm a woman as rare as you.

  10. I thought that the main reason why we ask too many damned questions is ‘coz that’s the only way to get you guys to exercise ie. by jumping hoops. *grins*

    Andrea

    ROTFL

    Exercise? Jumping hoops? You crack me up, ma’am

    Good one!

  11. Mat-san,

    Kindly let me respond to Elviza`s.Many Thanks, my friend.

    Ma`am…me clever?You`re giving me too much credit.I`m as fallible, and as ignorant about most of the reasons behind the cruel twists and turns in this life which, for simplicity, we term as “fate” or “destiny” , as the next man(and woman).Still very much on the learning curve, Ma`am.

    All I`m guided by, Ma`am, is what my beloved grandma taught me years ago,when I was still very young…heaven lies in the soles of a woman.And the opposite gander has had my eternal respect, since(though yours truly has often been much maligned on many ocassions due to this, I admit).

    As for that Russian what`s his name.I believe it`s Dostoevsky, of that “Crime & Punishment” classic.

    Can I just say this, Ma`am…I enjoy your writings, as much as Mat B`s, and these are the 2-blogs which contents tug at the heart-strings oftentimes.Do keep it up, the both of you.

    Thanks again, Mat-san, and keep that chin up!

    Cheers!

  12. Scuse me, Mat (forgive the atrocious spelling too for I can’t be bothered to spell-check. Heh!)

    Higashi-san,

    Oh, do not M’am me, my dear. You know me what? Yesterday?

    Yep, that’s the name of the lembab man – Dostoevsky – who writes layers upon layers of gems about life. True what they say: good ones will die early.

    Andrea Whatever,

    ROTFLOL. He he hehe heheh, wicked sense of humor I must say. Am still laughing.

    Mat,

    Please, they don’t see envy and hope when they look my husband and I. They will see two strong heads, who during that temporary lapse of sanity, decided to get married.

    Blinded by diamond. A life time cheated. Remember that?

    I didn’t know, back then, that he will grow to love his golf balls more than me. But who am I to complain when I spend more time carressing books and staring at the laptop than talking to him?

    Eh, apa nih? This is not supposed to be therapy, woman!

    BTW, that Jamal’s wife is a lucky woman. Tell him that for I believe it is in men’s nature to cheat.

    *ducking out now, am sure your male readers are throwing stone at me as we speak*

  13. I read somewhere up there, ” You UNCLES are scaring me more and more everyday…bla..bla..bla…”

    So UNCLES …… enjoy jer lah the barrage of questions while you can still hear ’em. It won’t be long before speech will be slurred and hearing will be impaired.

    You might as well record some of the series of interrogations to help remind you much later of how sweet those damned questions are actually; just like we might as well record some of the snores, the burps and other earth shaking sounds ‘Uncles’ are capable of producing without an inkling (or rather regard) of how hazardous they can be to the environment.

    🙂 Just some random thoughts for the future…

    Ibu

    What a wonderful perspective! I never thought about it in this way.

    Thanks

  14. “… for I believe it is in men’s nature to cheat” said Elviza.

    Sadly, I have to agree to that. Unless you guys can convince your partners otherwise (through your actions, body language, tender loving care and not mere words) facing too many damned questions will always be your fate and destiny haha! Not that by asking will get us answers but is a way to get back at you guys, you see.

    Asking actually get us nowhere, like Elviza said, why subject ourselves to lies when we are probably already deceived…pathetic huh?

    Elsie

    The asking is not to get answers but to get back at us? Wow! This is a totally new angle – one that has escaped me thus far. See? I learn something new everyday. Thanks, Elsie.

    But, ma’am, I don’t think men have a monopoly on cheating. I’ve known quite a few women who cheat, too. The only difference is that men tend to brag about it while women would rather chew glass rather even hint at it. Its just bad luck that more men get caught at it 🙂

  15. Ok, ladies, here’s another one of your ‘FAQ’ that u don’t need to ‘Sai Hei’ (Cantonese for not to ‘waste your breath on’); Allow Tommy to answer on behalf of my down-throddened brethrens;

    ‘Why don’t u stop & ask for direction?’ Grrrr…..

    What’s wrong here, ladies? No, it’s not male stubbornness. It’s YOU. You & your lack of sympathy. Of course we know we’re lost. But we are proud, simple creatures. To admit we’re lost is deeply humiliating. It’s the vehicular equivalent of erectile dysfunction. What’s important is that we’re allowed to drive around in circles until we work out where we’re going by a process of luck & elimination. And NEVER, ever say “I told you we should have stopped & asked.”

    Just accept us as the idiots we are. You will be showered with gratitude & possibly even acceptable birthday presents – errr..i.e.….if we remember the date lah, which sadly, we won’t.{Not intentionally lah}

    Peace,

    Tommy

    P/S – Yes NanaDJ, men do have ‘suicidal tendency’ ever since our super hero Charles Bronson made & starred in his ‘Death Wish’ series. It make living life in the fast last so much more exciting! And no, FYI, it is NOT a midlife crisis thingy. (We have this tendency since puberty), TQ.

    Tommy

    You da man!

  16. Mr B,

    A wife is a “chosen” partner. Keep your wife happy, you’ll be a happy man..

    Clients come and go.. no?

    V

    In principle you are right, of course. You are absolutely, 100 per cent, without-a-doubt right!

    Just a thought: this keep-the-other-person-happy thing works both ways, right? Maybe men should, once in a while, stop and ask for directions no matter how humiliating this can be. Personally, I do this all the time and its no skin off my back; I am no less of a man for it. By the same token, can we perhaps have a few less questions (especially the loaded kind) every now and then?

    I’m sure we can come to some sort of an arrangement, right.

    As my man Tommy Yew is fond of saying lately, “Peace!”

    • Mr B,

      Nay, it’s not about being right. And yes, it works both ways..

      Now, what else can I say.. except repeating that you are a good man. And, oh yes, peace and God bless.

  17. i have a stock answer to my wife for unnecessary questions. even to this day she’s still blur and what i mean.

    “saja-lah”. that’s it. period. full stop.

    kassim

    kassim ahmad

    Thanks for the tip, sir. Now please excuse me while I go off to practice intoning “Saja-lah” until I get it spot on 🙂

  18. Greetings,

    On the contrary, it is when i don’t ask any question, i get the answer.

    Saves my breath aye?

    FM

    You’re a sly one. Smart move! Smart move!

    Just as I thought: fewer questions IS actually good all around.

  19. I don’t ask. Really I don’t. I just keep very quiet and very still for the next ten minutes and then he comes blabbering for 10 min explaining everything nervously ending with ‘Can you stop being so quiet now? I told you everything already!’

    Reverse psychology is my forte, mister 🙂
    Hehe

    percicilan

    hahaha!

    You are another sly one! See? Not asking questions IS really better for all concerned. This is my contention all along: not woman-bashing (as perceived by those who patently got their knickers in a twist over this).

    Keep well, ma’am

    🙂

  20. Salam AbgB,

    hmm….I’ve learnt a lot today.

    im naturally someone who likes to ask. its not abt trust. kinda built-in. he knows i love to ask and he got used to it over the years (its been 16yrs and still going strong).

    but of course lah, level of tolerance lessen as you age, so now he’ll say “you wanna go ask yourself, dear?” , then i stop.

    hehe…not good, rite.

    anakumie

    16 years! Well done, anakumie!

    Lets look at it this way. Even your most favourite song in the whole wide world will start to wear thin if you hear it often enough. Just one more time over the threshold and you’re gonna begin to hate the song.

    You’re smart enough to figure out where your hubby’s threshold is. You’re gonna be fine.

  21. Mat B, here’s a story for you to mull over.

    Once upon a time, a man met and married a woman. Hardly three months into the marriage, the man forgot to log off his PC (it was opened at the mail page) and his wife saw a strange ‘selamat berkenalan’ message from an unknown woman (unknown to her, that is).

    She confronted him for an explanation. She was livid. “You have difficulties leaving your old single life behind? You are now someone’s husband and you still want to ‘berkenalan’ with women you met on the internet? You still keep your online dating account? WTFH did you marry me for?”

    So the man and the woman came to an understanding; if ever he screws up, she will walk out. She meant every word she said. He said it was a mistake and that it would not happen again. She was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt, at that juncture.

    She believed him then and still believes him now. She has not asked any question since. The last time I poked my head into their life, they seem quite happy together… 🙂

    Puteri Kamliah

    A wonderful story. It started off a little scary but turned out well, eh?

    I am getting more and more convinced that when fewer questions are asked, the domestic happiness factor will acquire a tendency to skyrockets through the roof.

    And so as to prevent even more ladies from needlessly get their knickers into the proverbial twist – due to maybe denial or perhaps guilt – I’ll qualify my statement: the principle works both ways. The message got a little skewed because historically, women tend to ask a lot more questions than men – a hell of a lot more 🙂

  22. Hey Matt, I was over at 3540 Jalan Sudin and I realised that the tiff is not just about ‘they’ asking too many questions; it’s to do with your sarong/T-shirt PJ & munching keropok lekor b4 bedtime! LOL!!!

    Be like me lah, wear sexy satin boxer with a big smiley 🙂 in front….heheh.

    It’s a mad3 world!

    You guys have a good weekend!

    Go Chelsea!!!
    Tommy

  23. Hi again.

    Thot I’d share this ‘her and his diary’ that I received from my AB today..

    WIFE’S DIARY:
    Sunday night – I thought he was acting weird.
    We had made plans to meet at a cafe to have some coffee. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment.

    Conversation wasn’t flowing so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk, he agreed but his mind was far away. I asked him what was wrong – he said, ‘Nothing.’ I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said it had nothing to do with me and not to worry.

    On the way home I told him that I loved him, he simply smiled and kept driving. I can’t explain his behavior; I don’t know why he didn’t say,

    ‘I love u, too.’

    When we got home I felt as if I had lost him, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there and watched TV; he seemed distant
    and absent.

    Finally I decided to go to bed. About 10 minutes later he came to bed.

    I decided that I could not take it anymore, so I decided to confront him with the situation but he had fallen asleep. I started crying and cried until I too fell asleep. I don’t know what to do.

    I’m almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else.

    My life is a disaster.

    HUSBAND’s DIARY:

    What do you think
    Today LIVERPOOL lost again!!!!!

    V

    This is absolutely delicious! It pretty much sums up the difference between how a man and a woman thinks. Just coz we are different doesn’t mean we should be at each other’s throats all the time, eh? The problem, I guess, is not in the differences. The problem is really lies with those who have a pathological need to be ‘right’.

    What says you?

    • Mr B,

      This pathological need to be ‘right’.. I guess to some people, it is a very big deal. I do wonder why one needs to be right to begin with.

      One thing for certain, only their ideas count and viewpoints, the right way to think. And the way you do things too.. (Speaking from experience: my ma-in-law.. ha ha, but she has mellowed so much, thank God!)

      I suppose if you enjoy polemic, go ahead and have one- it can be pretty invigorating. If not, just agree and it’ll take the wind out of his/her sails.

      My take: being right is not the be-all end-all.

      On a lighter note, I hope Yuna’ll go to AJL (which is Anugerah Juara Lagu, btw have you attended any? Or so not you..?) and I leave this for you..

      The Silent Treatment

      A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each
      other the silent treatment.

      Suddenly, the man realized that the next day,
      he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.

      Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,

      “Please wake me at 5:00 AM.” He left it where he knew she would find it.

      The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM
      and he had missed his flight.

      Furious, he was about to go and
      see why his wife hadn’t wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by
      the bed.

      The paper said, “It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.”

      Men are sooo not equipped for these kinds of contests, eh?

      V

      Thing is – for a few years now – I’ve begun to question the wisdom of positioning men as fighters. Yeah, they may be better equipped for it physically. However, they fail miserably at it in the mental department. Men are not too quick to go straight for the jugular, fight dirty and throw the rulebook out the window. Despite what the movies portray, men aren’t really that trigger-happy.

      I know what you mean about these people who insist on always being right. Frankly, I think this stems either from intellectual insecurity or a lack of emotional fortitude. These people just cannot, or refuse to see (either sub-consciously or otherwise) the other person’s point of view for fear that they will lose their own. Its can be almost like dealing with a blind person who is adamant that an elephant is actually an unusually large man.

      And I, too, adopt your tact of simply agreeing with them – and thereby take the wind from their sails. Sometimes this is the price we have to pay for peace. But doing this too often may later spark an even bigger and and more destructive conflict.

      Such is life, V (sigh)

      • Life is what we make of it, Mr B. I’d like to think that men are mostly wise and good beings. I am quite fortunate in the sense that the few men that matter in my life are just that. You kind of fit into this category- I mean wise and good. Fight when you have to fight and fight a good fight. Why fight dirty. Later, upon reflection, you’ll find that you like yourself more. At the end of the day you have to live with yourself. We are discussing man/woman in general, yes?

        Anyway, I don’t really take the easy path all the time. In whatever situations, there are always two choices – two paths to take. One is easy. And its only reward is that it’s easy… Hey, no sighing allowed here!

  24. no la mr bangkai..we dont ask simply simply one..and for the loaded question ones, dont you think its brilliant and creative of us to always want to be at the top of our game in capturing our husband (or in this case MY husband)’s slinky panky sneaky act out there when we thought they were actually slaving for the good of the wife and kids?

    mizkook

    I have to admit that the loaded questions are creative (in their own way). Yes, they help you stay on top of the game IF – and this is a BIG ‘if’ – your hubby happens to be a philanderer. He’s got it coming to him – all of it!

    However, what if he is not a philanderer? Contrary to popular belief (and what is portrayed in women’s magazines), there are more men who are faithful that there are those who are not. In this case, loaded questions – no matter how creative – do more damage than good. The worse case scenario is that they (loaded questions) might backfire and drive a once faithful hubby into a life of unbridled clandestine debauchery.

    By all means, stay on top of your game. But at the same time, be careful not to drive him off the edge. If he says he is out there slaving for the wife and kids, leave it at that. But once you find him playing ‘hide the sausage’ with some floosie, hit the ground running – with both guns blazing 🙂

  25. As a young women who is unmarried but with a lotta older married friends, i must say……. this happens quite a lot.

    My sex is neither fair nor nonstrategic when it comes to interrogations. And the jealousy is sometimes a bit much (although men are prone to this disease too, methinks).

    And I have come to wonder…… Does marriage do this to women? Or are we just going to get to that stage because of age? I see my friends getting married or getting older and acting out just as the above written. Even though before they seemed like mild and timid creatures…….

    I don’t think I want to get married…… Perhaps i’ll go to Neverneverland and stay a child forever…..

  26. Hello,,,
    you call it “a barrage of questions”……….some or rather most men says that they are facing a firing squad ready to be terminated…..
    women (not all), on the other hand…. wants to share the on going things/events in their hubby’s/partners life…….call it ‘inquisitive’ if you have to.
    Try communicating…….essence of all partnership
    …..goodluck

  27. Hi Matt, I just stop over to wish u & everyone here, “Selamat Hari Raya Haji” & stay safe!

    Holiday funnies;

    What a woman says;

    “Man, look at this place! C’mon, you & I need to clean up before my mum shows up. Look, your stuff is lying on the floor & you’ll have no clothes to wear if we don’t do the washing right now!”

    What the man hears;

    blah, blah, blah, blah, C’MON
    blah, blah, blah, blah, YOU & I
    blah, blah, blah, blah, ON THE FLOOR
    blah, blah, blah, blah, NO CLOTHES
    blah, blah, blah, blah, RIGHT NOW!

    Salam,
    Tommy,

  28. Salam Mr B,
    ..which reminds this old man…that acquaintances sometime marry..only to divorce on knowing each other well..yet again, in the days of old, when marriages were prearranged, strangers marry, with patience, committment and devotion, get to know each other, learn to love each other and stayed married, until death do they part…but women, then, do not asked to many questions..being not yet fully emancipated..

  29. Every time my wife asks me “Who was that on the phone?”, I would answer: –

    “You remember my trip to (insert last outstation destination)? Did I tell you about that gorgeous lady I met at the hotel? No? Oh she was … blah-blah-blah …”

    of course making it as preposterous as I could as I go along.

    She never knows whether to disbelieve me or not.

    Sir Cipan

    This, sir, is the approach I would take too – if I could get away with it 🙂

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